Ireland, 2005/6 and 2008/9
Ireland was decided as the opening venue as much for its deep golfing history as for the fact that Dave’s mum and dad owned a wonderful little cottage in the sleepy costal inlet of Union Hall in West Cork – one of many hamlets in Ireland that appears to have more pubs than people.
Breantra, to give it its Gaelic name, ended up being the base for the first 4 MADJIC battles and I must say that the golf, the craic and the hospitality of the Irish has left a lasting impression on all those that were lucky enough to have been part of the tour back in the day.
The bridge into Union Hall
The highlights are just too many to mention but whether drinking copious amounts of Bulmers at the Glandore Inn, enjoying a sumptuous fish supper at Mary Anne’s in Castletownshend or necking pints of Guinness and whisky chasers whilst playing pool in Maloney’s, the laughs were loud and long.
The view over Adam Island from the Glandore Inn
It was our first introduction to the Chenery ‘double shave’.
We all got to enjoy an 80 yard direct chip in from Dave as we waited on the green for him to hit his 6th shot.
We all bonded strongly with Dobbo, our neighbour in Nell’s Cottage.
None of us bonded with Dinty, the least smiley purveyor of exceptional pies in West Cork.
We all took part in a late night ‘4 pints of Guinness and 4 packets of Taytos’ in your most Oirish of accents competition (Probert won)
Justin managed to alienate every local fisherman by dropping ‘In Da Club’ on the jukebox and Dave and Michael managed to stay out of hospital after devouring an out of date chicken sandwich that had been picked up en route to play golf at Kinsale – ironically the gourmet capital of Ireland.
“Dave, does your chicken sandwich have avocado in it?” Mike inquired, believing he had lucked out with some additional deli filling. On inspection, the luxuriously soft-textured green substance had also been bestowed upon Dave but unfortunately, it was not supplementary to the chicken. It was the chicken.
Further investigation showed that every single item we had been sold was out of date; Crisps, chocolate bars, savoury snacks, everything. Not quite a revenge worthy of avenging the atrocities of Bloody Sunday, but a small yet significant ‘Ups Yours’ to the out-of-towners.
Ireland offered up a fabulous array of courses and our time in West Cork presented us an opportunity to visit Bantry Bay, a personal favourite of some MADJIC members – a wonderfully lush track that opens with a downhill par 3 with a water hazard and proceeds to hug the bay overlooking Whiddy Island for 14 of the remaining 17 holes.
Pro – The wonderful 2nd at Bantry
Highlights were the astounding 10th hole, snaking all 423 yards around the corner of the bay and Justin’s attempt to dismount his buggy between the 9th green and 10th tee during a 360 spin that saw his life flash before his eyes. The sheer panic was priceless and he was lucky to escape with no serious injury. The same can’t be said for his deserted passenger, Chenners, who cracked a rib as the out-of-control contraption hurtled down the hill.
Chenners – 9th Hole at Bantry Bay
The fairy tale course of Lisselan dubbed “perhaps the most unique course in the world” by Christy O’Connor will live long in the memory. Replete with trains up to the 2nd and 4th tees and a raft to ferry golfers across the lake to the 8th, it was always fun to play; something we were especially thankful for during the great wash-out of 2009, the only time the weather really conspired against us. We ended up playing Lisselan 2 or 3 times, but there was always something to savour.
If the holes weren’t incredulous enough, one time Lisselan also played host to ‘the worst golf swing ever bar none’™. Never have 4 men sniggered, pointed and then laughed out loud so much on a golf course. The swing has since been dubbed the ‘drunk Octopus chopping wood’ but I’m not even sure if that does it justice.
The train up to the 2nd tee – Lisselan
Picking a favourite course during this period would be like picking a favourite amongst your children, but it’s fair to say that Skibbereen and West Carbery was and undoubtedly remains the friendliest course in West Cork. Architect of Probert’s post-child golfing decline, theatre of Chenery’s sumptuous ‘extra point’ hybrid to the 17th green on a re-re-re-load and scene of comedy gold as barman Barry, on his first day on trial front-of -house looked behind whilst ‘reversing’ the buggy forwards straight into a wall.
This hotchpotch of reclaimed farmers’ fields and lush mature parkland holes both frustrated and delighted in equal measure but the welcome was heartfelt, the chips were hot and Barry was hilarious. It’s the mark of a great course when you can still remember every single hole 5 years after you’ve played it and that’s what Skib has done.
Tricky Opening Drive at Skibbereeen
(scene of a ‘white or yellow tee’ discussion between the men and the woman)
Ring of Kerry felt like a more professional set-up but it came at the price of a whopping 50 mile, 2 hour seemingly never ending cross-country, cross-mountain drive punctuated with screams of ‘Jaysus’ from Justin as he rounded each hairpin bend to be confronted with another and another. But as you finally passed through pretty Kenmare and up the hill to the club, RoK offered stunning views across Kenmare Bay with the beautiful backdrop of the Kerry Mountains in the distance. Not dissimilar to Bantry in terms of its lofty location around a bay, the clubhouse was sumptuous, the welcome warm and the golf delivered some outstanding holes in top condition. Whilst an excellent course that we wouldn’t hesitate to return to it possibly just lacks the MADJIC heritage of Bantry or the wide-eyed glee gained from Lisselan.
Ring of Kerry Golf Club
The 4 years of competition and 4 lines on the obscenely cheap but lasciviously coveted winner’s ‘Jug’ were shared equally between Michael and Justin who looked like they were going to dominate the competition in a Scottish Premier League type of way.
These were the days when a shake of the hand at the end of the tournament and a quick raise of the trophy back at the cottage was deemed enough celebration; though if memory doesn’t fail me, the winner of 2009 went into the final day at Bantry in a very strong position and it just so happened that when we toasted his victory in the bar at the end, the trophy popped out of his golf bag, ready to be presented to him as his speech had already prepared.
MADJIC had just gone up a notch.