Callington, Cornwall, England 2011, 2012
And then there were 7.
As word of this fabled tournament began to spread around South London and beyond, it was determined by secret ballot that another lucky person would be the recipient of a ‘Golden Ticket’, desperate to have the doors of the MADJIC factory opened to them.
David Frost became the real-life Charlie Bucket and like the literary grandpa Joe, it was his 80 year old clubs he dusted down, ready to make a name for himself.
On a sad note, we headed down the M4 without the MX5 in convoy as the death of Baz’s father meant he was driving north to make arrangements for the funeral. His terrible swing followed by the ball flying down the middle would be missed.
At least Baz had left us with the memory of 2010, which he had organized impeccably, so 2011 was the year for Stokesy to step up to the plate and prove to us that he wasn’t just a gaudy dresser with a loud voice. And that he most certainly did with meticulously planned sojourn to Cornwall.
Just a stone’s throw from the Tamar Bridge, between Dartmoor to the east and Bodmin Moor to the west, Big Nev’s Hawthorn Cottage offered 4 bedrooms, a lake view, a beautiful deck overlooking open fields, a donkey of its own and a table tennis table that would stage some extraordinary matches away from the cauldron of the golf course.
Hawthorn Cottage, Callington
The first year’s tournament took in the recently re-opened Kernow and the signature Nicklaus courses at St Mellion as well as China Fleet and the big question on everyone’s lips was whether or not Chilvers, like his fellow MADJIC winners before him could retain his trophy.
Kernow is set up like an American course with fairways and greens of generous proportions, and, consequently, the golf course doesn’t do intimidation but sweeps gently around the hills, softly through the trees and quietly along the valley.
The Nicklaus is Jack’s very first European design and had the one time master declaring it “..potentially the finest golf course in Europe” that has hosted the Benson & Hedges Masters with Olazabal, Langer and Ballesteros amongst the winners – three players who would have been welcomed into MADJIC.
It’s a frightening proposition using all the contours of the Tamar Valley to twist and turn around lake, river and stream to give the middle handicap golfer the ultimate test. Maybe too much of a test, especially if you are not unerringly straight but both courses rewarded thoughtful golf, meaning half the field were immediately discounted.
Opened in 1991, China Fleet is little England compared to St Mellion’s brash Americana up the road. Hugging the river Tamar it is tight and challenging, some might say windswept and bleak and it requires the player to hit many a blind tee shot. It has a health centre attached for the nouveau riche of Plymouth rather than the landed rich who are members up the road.
It was rather overshadowed on our trips to the south west but it had some wonderful holes, including a monster par 5 that I seem to remember Probert eagling with some mighty hits. Not the first or last time he has been known to enter the green whilst the group ahead are holing out!
Frost was a perfect addition to MADJIC. He brought a sartorial style and was a relaxed presence to play with, hitting enough good shots to warrant his inclusion but not enough to worry the titans of the tour – and the titans of 2011 were Chilivaro and Chenners.
With Justin struggling to regain the form of 2 years previously, Probert unable to put 2 great holes together in a row, Stokesy still learning and Frosty rusty from so few rounds in the previous 10 years, it turned into a bit of a head to head. The experience of the previous year carried Chilvers through as Chenners succumbed, left to rue what might have been his best ever chance to pay some engravement fees and decorate his mantelpiece.
The following year the trip was repeated; in small part due to the success of the previous year but in large part due to the general laziness of the group. Same cottage, same courses, same players but with a few twists.
Baz was back and we added Bovey Castle to the list of venues. One of those changes turned out to be a masterstroke as Bovey Castle was a genuine thrill, magically nestled as it was in the heart of the beauty and wildness of Dartmoor. The house was a folly, built for Lord Hambledon in 1906 and the course was designed by the same architect who planned Addington and Worplesdon. An enticing downhill par 4 over a stream sets the scene for a lush and mature parkland course which meanders through the hotel grounds offering plenty of twists and turns.
We knew it was going to be a great day as soon as we drove the carts through a forest of rhododendrons to reach the well prepared and secluded practice ground. We enjoyed an entirely undisturbed warm up for what was a great round and memorable experience.
Life on the range – Bovey Castle
We welcomed back the much-missed Baz. Whilst great in terms of golfing prowess and gadgetry, it also brought with it a more microscopic adherence to the rule of the R&A and as anyone who did chemistry GCSE (that’s equivalent to ‘O’ Level for the older members) will tell you;
Baz + Stokes + Rules + Battle Heat = Bickering
So we had to endure the odd bout of tantrums and tiaras, mostly driven by Stokes’ choice of relief point but it wasn’t enough to take the shine off another good MADJIC.
An unprecedented 3rd Claret Jug for Probes, this time on the last hole over a more battle-hardy Baz was not the outcome the neutrals were after and the ensuing acceptance speech was seen in some quarters as more sardonic than sincere.
Possibly a fitting end to a MADJIC that whilst fun was a bit of a slog at times. The golf was not the best quality and we have vowed not to repeat the mistake of returning to a venue the following year.
Still, we will never forget the look on the members faces as an electronic trolley sped across the practice green prior to tee off, with a gangly Burberry-capped Anglo-Kenyan lolloping after it, the epitome of un-zen.
Or the howls of laughter and derision that greeted a boomed 1 wood on the 5th that couldn’t make the 160 yard carry despite a full-English and an hour in the gym prior to the game. Sensational stuff.
The beast that couldn’t be tamed – 5th at St Mellion
